Soul-Inspirations

Use 5 languages of love

Once on a rainy and muddy day when I was a child, my mother spoke crossly to my father when he tracked mud into the house just after she had washed the floor.

 

Shortly afterwards, a local dry cleaner and family friend named Paddy stopped by to deliver some dry cleaning. Paddy apologized for his muddy boots and said he didn’t want to step into the house.

 

“No, no, don’t worry about it,” said my mom. “It’s pouring outside. Come in, come in. It’s easy to wipe up the floor.”

 

After Paddy left, my dad commented on the difference in how my mom handled the two situations.

 

“Do you love me?” he asked my mom.

 

“Yes of course,” my mom answered.

 

“Do you love Paddy?”

 

“No,” my mom answered, somewhat offended.

 

“Well, stop loving me! Treat me like you treat the dry cleaning delivery man!”

 

They both started to laugh and the story became a family joke, but there’s an important question at the core of it. How do we express love to the people we care about?

 

Five love languages

 

A while ago I picked up The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate by Gary Chapman.

 

The basic premise is that we each have a preferred way of expressing love, and a preferred way of having love expressed to us. Sometimes people who love each other don’t recognize they ways they express love to each other because they are speaking different “languages.”

 

I scanned the book and decided to buy it because it had a quiz in it. I thought it would be fun for my husband and I to compare what the quiz suggested about our “love languages.”

 

My husband humored me by doing the quiz, and we enjoyed learning more about each other’s styles of expressing and receiving love. Fortunately, our styles are complementary. But we have both been in previous relationships where the styles were not compatible. We can definitely tell the difference!

 

What’s your style?

 

Chapman says there are five “love languages,” or ways of expressing and receiving love.

 

· Words of affirmation – saying kind and affirming things to one another; expressing appreciation; being a cheerleader;

 

· Acts of service – doing kind and thoughtful things to make the other person’s life easier, or so the person feels pampered and appreciated;

 

· Quality time together – creating time and space to pay attention to one another;

 

· Physical touch – this includes but is not limited to sex; hugs, gentle touches, reassuring touches, holding hands also express love;

 

· Gifts – tiny gifts or expensive gifts, we vary in how important gifts are to us, and the kind of gifts that best express love to us.

 

Different sending and receiving “love languages”

 

We do not necessarily send and receive messages of love in the same style. For example, I often say affirming things without even thinking about it. Speaking words of love comes naturally to me. I am especially moved when someone does an act of kindness for me. That makes me feel loved. So “words of affirmation” is my natural “love language” for expressing love, and “acts of service” is a “love language” I can receive and understand most easily.

 

My least likely expression of love is to send a gift, and though I appreciate receiving gifts, they are not all that important to me as a way to receive love. On the other hand, a famous actress was once quoted as saying to a man who brought her a single exquisite rose, “That’s nice, but where are the diamonds?”

 

What is your most natural way to express love? And what is your favorite way to receive expressions of love?

 

And the connection to entrepreneurs is…

 

As soul-driven conscious entrepreneurs, we want the best for our clients and customers – which is a form of love. We each have natural ways of expressing that love. However, our natural ways of expressing it may not include all five “love languages.”

 

Our clients and customers almost certainly include people who receive expressions of love in all five “languages.” Are we expressing our care for them in all five ways?

 

What words of affirmation, what acts of service, what quality time, what “touch” (e.g., reaching out) and what gifts can we use so that our clients and customers really “get” that we care for them, and really “receive” that feeling of love and support?

 

Your Coaching Challenge

 

1. In the next week, write yourself a chart with five sub-headings, one for each phase of the marketing process:

a. “Lead” activities – getting attention, attracting interest

b.    “Prospect” activities – gaining trust; helping people to know like and trust you

c. “Customer” activities – at the time your clients and customers make their first purchase

d.   “On-going client” activities – follow-up to the first purchase; follow up to subsequent purchases

e.   “Champion” activities – when clients and customers rave about you and refer other people to you

 

2. Under each phase, list the five “love languages”

a.   Words of affirmation

b.   Acts of service

c.   Quality time

d.   Touch

e.   Gifts

 

List all the ways you now use some form of this “love language” to express your care for the person at this phase of the marketing process.

If you notice that some “love languages” are missing from some phases, think how you can add them.

 

3. Choose one area to strengthen in the next week. And over the next weeks, add one thing each week until all the “missing love languages” are present at every phase of your marketing.

 

4. As you develop and launch new products and services, continue to use this “love language checklist” to make sure your leads, prospects, first-time customers, ongoing clients and champions really “get” how much you want the best for them.

 

Going Global

 

1.   Use words of affirmation to write a love letter to the earth.
(You can post your letter at www.unitedworldhealing.org, the website of an organization that gathers together millions of people in group visualizations to manifest a world that protects, respects and reveres humankind, animal kind and the environment.)

 

2.   Think of ways you can also use acts of service, quality time, touch and gifts as ways to express love for the earth.

 

3.  Each day, take time for one action that expresses your love and appreciate for the earth.

Spring from principles to action

Last week we talked about seven foundation principles of soul power – intention, integrity, intuition, imagination, inner guidance, integration and “I” (your highest wisest self). These create the foundation environment for success in business and personal life.

 

I love hanging out in the realms of intention and imagination, but we are also in this world to have physical experiences. The essence of manifesting is to bring our highest visions and intentions into physical form. To do that, we need to take action – inspired action -- in the physical realm.

 

As I’ve reflected on what inspired actions have led to the most amazing and awesome results for my clients and myself, I realize we have repeated the same steps again and again.

 

Seven Soul Power Steps take you from the “gleam in the eye” stage to “wow, we achieved a miracle.”

 

Seven Crucial Steps for Success

 

Pre-step: Clear a space. Before beginning the seven steps, it’s helpful to “clear a space” for something new. You may need to make space in your calendar, tidy up some clutter, or in some other way do some action that symbolizes to yourself that you are making a space for embarking on these seven steps.

 

1. Set your intention – The clearer your statement of intention the better. Write it down. Say it out loud. Let it sink into your mind, body and emotions. And then make it even stronger. Resolve to make this intention a reality in your life. Once you’ve decided, you’ll notice a shift as energy begins to re-align.

 

2. Align with your soul’s purpose – Your soul wants only your happiness, and your soul knows your life purpose. Sit quietly, and consciously open yourself to be guided by your soul’s deepest and highest wisdom. Ask if your intention is in alignment with your soul’s purpose and your highest good. You’ll likely get a “yes” or “no” feeling. If it’s “yes,” move on. If it’s “no,” ask for more information until you are confident that your intention is in alignment.

 

3. Magnetize your intention – In my spiritual travels, I have learned many techniques that help to attract whatever is needed or desired in a particular situation. For example, you can act as if it is already happening. Ask for divine help. Put yourself in situations like what you wish to attract. Visualize your path. Notice and express gratitude for anything that is moving in the direction you want. Imagine yourself as a magnet, effortlessly drawing in what is perfect for right now.

 

4. Dissolve barriers and fears – Every time any of us decides to take a new step, we are likely to face fears. If the step is a big one, it is not unusual for all of our limiting beliefs and fears to rise up in a deafening chorus of resistance. And, almost always, there are also external barriers and obstacles. It is as if the Universe is asking, “Do you really want this? Are you serious about this intention?”

 

I appreciate the advice to “Feel the fear and do it anyway,” but usually I need help before I can do that! I am eternally grateful to Jeanie Marshall who taught me techniques to work directly with the energy of fear – regardless of what the fear is about. If you can shift the energy of fear, then whatever the fear is about tends to disappear as well. That in turn helps to dissolve any other barriers or obstacles along the way.

 

5. Raise your vibration – Every thought and every emotion has a certain vibration or frequency. Your dreams and desires have a frequency. The idea of raising your vibration is to be on the same frequency as that which you want to manifest in your life. You can do this by being attentive to your thoughts, emotions and physical environment so they are at a frequency that synchronizes with what you intend to create.

 

6. Build momentum – Like a ball rolling down a hill, once a dream begins to manifest, it starts to pick up speed and force. And like a ball rolling down a hill, a little nudge now and then can help it along.  Three ways to build momentum are…

· If it’s early in your manifestation process, take one small step every day – one inspired action -- just so you know you are beginning to move. My friend Sandy Grason suggests a great question to ask yourself: “What one action can I take today that will have the greatest impact on my life?”

· At some point, it’s really useful to do “total immersion.” Block off half a day or a full day to be totally immersed. You may be amazed at how much can happen in a couple of completely focused hours.

· Another way to build momentum – once you are excited and confident – is to get other people involved who are excited too. Be sure to pick positive people who are genuinely enthusiastic about what you’re doing. The group will begin to create a bigger buzz and that too creates momentum.

 

7. Celebrate and appreciate – Success breeds success. Notice and celebrate small and big successes. Appreciation and gratitude are magnetic. They help attract even more things to celebrate and appreciate.

 

Macro and micro

 

These seven steps are macro and micro. They can apply to a big dream. They can also apply to a tiny task. The steps operate as a spiral. As you move to a different phase of a project or a process, you repeat the steps in “mini” form.

 

When I look back at all the times I have manifested perfection – for my clients or myself – these are the steps I have followed, the soul actions I have taken.

 

When the Seven Foundation Principles of Soul Power are combined with the Seven Soul Power Steps, this becomes the Soul Power system – and it is unstoppable!

 

Your coaching challenge

 

1.   Pick a project, a task, a dream, an event, or something on your “to do” list for the next week.

 

2.   Take five minutes maximum to reflect on where you are in the seven-step process with this item.

· Set the intention

· Align with your soul’s purpose

· Magnetize your intention

· Dissolve barriers and fears

· Raise your vibration

· Build momentum

· Celebrate and appreciate

 

Do this lightly. Just let the impressions come to you. If you want to remember something, make a quick note of it.

 

3.   Then let all of that go. Without dwelling on any step, just imagine that you are dancing through the seven steps, in whatever form they may take. Then imagine that you are celebrating and appreciating, completely immersed in joy.

 

4.   If you enjoy this process, take a few minutes every day to “dance through the steps” in your imagination, and savor the joy of celebration and appreciation.

 

Going Global

 

1.   Imagine something you would like to have happen on the planet, something that’s bigger than all of us, that would make the world more joyful, more loving, more beautiful, or more harmonious. It could be a small thing or a big thing. It could be something physical, emotional, mental, social, financial, commercial, environmental, political… whatever comes to your mind.

Got it?

 

 2.   Imagine many people around the world dancing through whatever steps it takes to bring this reality into physical form. You don’t have to know what the steps are to imagine people dancing. Imagine you are joyfully dancing as part of the global celebration and appreciation.

 

3.   Have fun imagining this. The more you enjoy it, the more your vibration will rise, and that in itself will enrich your life, and help to lift the planetary vibration.

Foundations of Soul Power

One of the joys of being an entrepreneur is that we get to make it up as we go along. We can use our businesses, not only to make a profit and provide a service, but to be a vehicle for expressing and attracting our soul’s desires.

 

In a teleseminar series with Alexandria Brown and David Neagle called “The 7 Mindset and Manifesting Secrets of Multimillionaire Entrepreneurs,” they said the first secret is Desire. Being in alignment with our soul’s desire is the starting point for creating, attracting and manifesting all that it takes for a successful life and business.

 

Whatever word comes into your mind when you ask, “What’s my most important value?” is part of your soul’s desire.

 

Our souls want only our happiness. Over the past twenty years, as I discovered and wove spiritual practices into how I worked with clients, I realized that the most successful results came from seven foundation principles and seven action steps.

 

Seven Foundation Principles of Soul Power

 

The Soul Power system is based on seven foundation principles. I’ve noticed that the most successful entrepreneurs I know have these qualities.

 

1. Intention – being clear about the over-arching purpose; going beyond defining outcomes to a larger purpose such as, “Whatever I say or do is in the highest good of my clients, myself and the planet.”

 

2. Integrity –being honest and transparent, being authentic, and being true to the intention.

 

3. Intuition – being open to the wisdom of hunches, impressions, inner nudges and possibilities.

 

4. Imagination – being free to play with possibilities, being open to magic, asking questions like, “What result would be the most fun, the easiest and the most powerful all at once?”

 

5. Inner guidance – seeking and listening to the wisdom of our higher selves; being open to divine guidance.

 

6. Integration – engaging body, mind, heart and soul; qualitative and quantitative; left-brain and right-brain; visions, thoughts, feelings, facts and actions -- not one or another, but all of it!

 

7. “I”   (your highest wisest self) – inviting the highest and wisest aspects of yourself to guide your direction and process.

 

You might have noticed that the first four of these are “being” qualities, and next three are “doing” qualities.

 

Yes, you can weave all of these qualities into any situation without doing or saying things that cause people to roll their eyes or dismiss you as flaky. I’ve had a lot of fun discovering and refining techniques to ensure these seven foundation principles are infused into any situation – in ways that that are totally appropriate for the circumstances, the task and the people involved.

 

Seven Soul Power Steps

 

I love hanging out in the realms of intention and imagination, but we are also in this world to have physical experiences. The essence of manifesting is to bring our highest visions and intentions into physical form. To do that, we need to take action – inspired action -- in the physical realm.

 

As I’ve reflected on what inspired actions have led to the most amazing and awesome results for my clients and myself, I realize we have repeated the same steps again and again.

 

Seven crucial Soul Power Steps take you from the “wistful gleam in the eye” stage to “wow, we achieved a miracle.” Next week, I’ll say more about the seven steps.

 

Your coaching challenge

 

1.   Think of a goal, a project, a task, an event or anything that is on your “to do” list for the next week. Quick, pick one.

 

2.   While you hold that in your mind, imagine that it is infused with the energy of each of the seven Soul Power founding principles – intention, integrity, intuition, imagination, inner guidance, integration, and “I” (your highest self) – plus, whatever was the word that came into your mind when you asked yourself, “What’s my most important value?”

 

3.   What does your goal, project, task, event or “to do” item look like, sound like and feel like when it is infused with these positive energies?

 

4.   What one simple, easy thing can you say or do today that will amplify these positive energies? Do it!

 

 

Going Global

 

I believe that the seven founding principles of Soul Power are all facets of universal love, the source of all that is. I also believe that whatever word came to you when you asked yourself, “What’s my most important value?” is a facet of universal love. As we amplify these energies in any situation, we help to raise the planetary vibration.

 

So…

 

1.   Pick one of the seven Soul Power founding principles – whichever one appeals to you the most right now – intention, integrity, intuition, imagination, inner guidance, integration, “I” (your highest self). 
If none of these appeals to you at this moment, pick another energy – love, joy, truth, peace, fun, wisdom…or whatever was the word that came to you when you asked yourself, “What’s my most important value?”

 

2.   Imagine that you are out in space, looking back at the earth.

 

3.   Imagine that you can actually “see” or “hear” or “feel” the energy you picked. As you experience it, does it have a sound or color or sensation – or all three?

 

4.   In whatever form you perceive it, imagine that this positive energy is encompassing the entire earth, permeating the entire planet from the outer edges of the atmosphere, down to the surface, infusing all of the earth creatures and objects, and continuing into the molten centre of the earth. Imagine that the entire earth and all that it includes is permeated with this positive energy.

 

5.   When you feel “done for now,” stop.

 

6.   What’s one thing that you notice when the earth is infused with this energy?

 

Have fun playing with this. If the images or impressions shift and change, enjoy that too.

If you are moved to do or say something because of this, go for it.

 

Just a few minutes of imagining the earth permeated with positive energy may uplift how you feel, and that too will raise the planetary vibration.

The oath of integrity

An article in my local paper¹ pleased me greatly. Students in a marketing class at University of Alberta School of Business want to raise people’s awareness of the importance of ethics and integrity in business. Among other projects, they have developed an oath of integrity they hope will make its way to classrooms and boardrooms everywhere.

 

Business students take the lead

 

The business students were sickened by stories of ponzi schemes, bonuses paid to executives of bailed out companies and businesses profiting from the exploitation of vulnerable people. That is not what these students want in their business careers.

 

The idea for an oath of integrity grew out of one of the first discussions marketing professor Sharon Ryan had with them on the idea of moral responsibility: a person has a level of accountability for actions that cause harm to others, directly or indirectly, no matter how far removed they are from the situation. As the semester continued, the students' awareness grew into a desire to influence change. From this, the idea of an oath of integrity for business students was formed.

 

The idea of an ethics pledge is not a new one. The University of Western Ontario's Ivey School has had one since 2004, and Harvard recently created an MBA oath. What is different about this pledge is that it is student-driven, and one that they want to share with decision-makers in all areas of business and at all levels.

 

Professor Ryan says, "A lot of people hide behind the cloak of the corporation, thinking they're not responsible and that, if they make a mistake, nobody's going to point the finger at them. This pledge makes them think very deeply about their direct responsibility in their decisions."

 

The oath is part of the students' commitment to live up to their moral responsibilities as future business leaders. By using viral marketing strategies, they are hoping that their pledge will spread and be taken by businesses and schools around the world.

 

Oath of Integrity

 

Here is the Oath of Integrity the students developed.

 

I promise to act with the utmost integrity in balancing the ethics of societal well-being, individual rights, tenets of justice, and principles of care in my efforts to manage the resources of the enterprises I endeavor to serve.

 

I understand that integrity is defined as the quality of being whole and undivided in my thoughts and in my actions. It requires that I act in a state of being consistently of sound moral principles such that:

· I promise to act with honesty.

· I promise to be helpful to stakeholders when called upon.

· I promise to act with competence throughout my career.

· I promise to be fair to people and to treat them with respect.

· I promise to uphold the principles of honor and promise-keeping.

· I will foster an attitude of action orientation whenever possible.

· I will strive to create sustainable organizational, environmental, social, and technological prosperity balancing both short and long term interests.

 

I make this oath freely and sincerely, and upon my honor.

 

And the message for entrepreneurs is…

 

The good news for entrepreneurs is… we have the freedom and authority to design our businesses around our values and integrity. The entrepreneurs that I know personally do that automatically, like breathing. Many entrepreneurs have left the corporate world at least in part so they can more easily live and work within their values and integrity.

 

The bad news AND the good news is… anything that is not in alignment with our soul’s purpose and core integrity is simply not going to work for us. If ever there was a time to make sure we are aligned with our soul’s purpose, our deepest wisdom and our core of integrity, THIS is the time. And if ever there was a time to combine our soul’s wisdom with practical inspired action, THIS is the time.

 

Your Coaching Challenge

 

Have a look at every aspect of your business operation to see if each aspect is in alignment with your values and core integrity.

 

Going Global

 

Imagine a world in which small and large businesses are guided by principles of integrity and mutual respect; a world in which all individuals in all businesses understand that what happens to anyone affects all of us.

_______________

¹    The article on which this feature article is based is “Bringing Ethics Back” by Jamie Hanlon, Edmonton Journal, November 20, 2009

Love and Power

Rebuilding from the ground up, from the inside out

 

There’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately. As all around us we see old systems collapsing, it is more and more clear that whatever does not have a solid foundation, whatever is not truly sustainable, is simply not going to survive as planetary energy and human consciousness shift and change.

 

This is true on macro and micro levels. It’s true of the environment, the global economy, government and politics, and large-scale business. It’s also true in our personal lives and our entrepreneurial businesses.

 

So what is a solid foundation? What is sustainable? Jeddah Mali says, “When everything is changing, focus on what does not change.”  For me, that is inner core values and inner worth. Where once some of us might have relied on brute force or emotionless logic or centuries of tradition to deal with life, we now have to be in alignment with more subtle aspects of life: love, integrity, intention and inner wisdom.

 

And that’s a good thing! I have days when I feel scared and scattered – but what gets me through is continuing to re-connect with what does not change – love, integrity, the wisdom of my soul’s guidance (when my mind is not too scared or chattery to connect with it!), and the power of intention.

 

I believe the work of 2010 is to re-think and re-build from the inside out and from the ground up to make sure that everything in our lives and our businesses is in alignment with our soul’s purpose, our highest good, and the unique gifts that each one of us came here to contribute.

 

And… that means also being powerful – i.e., able to make a difference – in the real world that we inhabit. Power without love is harmful. Love without power is ineffectual.

 

Small scale large scale

 

My work for many years included organizational development, community development, and “system wide” development.

 

I got very good at learning how to make a difference in smaller communities. When I worked in large urban settings, it was not as simple. The “topics” were similar (essentially, making the social and physical environment healthy for everyone), but the scale and level of complexity was different.

 

I got very good at helping small to medium size organizations make changes that radically improved their service to clients, customers and the public, the satisfaction of their managers and employees, and achievement of their goals whether those goals were financial or forms of service to the public.  I even got good at helping multi-sector and multi-organization systems (say, the criminal justice system) to collaborate (even though they were not “legally” required to do so) in the best interests of those affected by the system and those who worked in it.

 

But… when it comes to multi-national, multi-stakeholder multi-cultural, multi-sector initiatives with global implications (say, the need for all human beings to have clean air, clean water, clean land, safe healthy food and safe physical environments), it’s not so clear to me how to make it so. I feel just a tad out of my depth!

 

I do believe, however, that the first step is to believe it matters, the second step is to become committed to making a positive difference, and the third step is to consult our inner wisdom about what to do next, and where to go for help.

 

My work in communities and with large organizations told me over and over again that when we open to inner guidance, small and large miracles happen. We can make a difference that extends beyond our wildest dreams. We tap into love and that helps us become powerful in a positive way.

 

And the issue for entrepreneurs is…

 

I believe that entrepreneurs often demonstrate, and certainly have the opportunity to model, ways of doing business that are both loving and powerful. At their best, entrepreneurs serve their clients, themselves and the world in a manner which is profitable and which honors the planet.

 

Perhaps if we as entrepreneurs turn our attention to large-scale global issues, we have gifts to offer that we haven’t even imagined yet!

 

A couple of books

 

If you, like me, have an interest in making change on a global level, you might be interested in the book that put this topic at the front of my mind this week:

 

Power and Love: A Theory and Practice of Social Change by Adam Kahane.

 

The back cover of the book sums it up nicely:  “The two methods most frequently employed to solve our toughest social problems – either relying on violence and aggression or submitting to endless negotiation and compromise – are fundamentally flawed. This is because the seemingly contradictory drives behind these approaches – power, the desire to achieve one’s objectives, and love, the urge to unite with others – are actually complementary. As Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. put it, ‘Power without love is reckless and abusive, and love without power is sentimental and anemic.’ But how do you combine them? This book tells stories of how the author learned to combine power and love.”

 

When I went to Amazon.com to see if Power and Love was available online, I also saw…

 

Love and Power: Awakening to Mastery by Lynn V. Andrews.

 

While I can’t speak directly for this book, the topic certainly resonates with me – especially for women -- and I have always been deeply and positively affected by the other Lynn Andrews’ books I’ve read.

 

Your Coaching Challenge

 

Think about the ways you use both love and power to create the life you want for yourself, your business and your customers and clients. Could you apply these methods to other aspects of your life?

 

Going Global

 

Thank about ways it could be possible to apply any of your successful methods to assist with larger global challenges – even if the methods appear to be small-scale at the moment!

Talk to your future

I had a conversation with my future self this week, and loved every minute of it.

 

My friend Carol Greenaway was coaching me through a process of clarifying the core gift I bring to the world. When we had clarity on that, she asked me to imagine it was the year 2015, five years from now. She asked me to visualize what my life was like when I was fully contributing and living that gift. She asked me to visualize myself in that life – what I would look like, what I’d be doing, how I would feel, and all of that.

 

It was a joyful vision.

 

Then Carol asked me to imagine having a conversation with my five-years-from-now self. What a blast! I can hardly wait to fully become that woman – and now that I’ve “met” her, it may not take five years.

 

So… I asked my five-years-from-now self to tell me more about her (my) life. That was a hugely expansive and delightful experience.

 

Then I asked my five-years-from-now self what advice she had for me in my life right here right now. Frankly, she was pretty blunt about what I have to let go of and what habits I need to change. She was also very encouraging about the progress she/I experience in the next few years.

 

I highly recommend having a conversation with your future, successful, highly-evolved self!

 

I have Carol Greenaway’s permission to include her contact information, in case you want to know more about the coaching process she used with me.

 

Carol Greenaway

Independent Life/Career Coach and Management Consulting Professional

Greenaway Consulting Services Ltd.

Edmonton, Alberta, Canada

cgreenaway@shaw.ca

(780) 993-6477 (Mountain time zone)

 

Your Coaching Challenge

 

Have a conversation with your wise, successful and highly-evolved future self.

 

1. Pick a future year (two years from now, five years from now, 20 years from now…). Think of what year it is and how old you are at that point.

2. Imagine as much as you can about the life you’ll love to be living at that point.

3. Imagine that you can have a conversation with your “self” in that experience. Get a “picture” or a “sound” or a “feel” for what it is like to be in the presence of that “self.”

4. Ask whatever you want to ask. Listen to whatever responses you “hear.”

5. When you finish the experience, say “Thank you” to your wise, successful and highly-evolved self.

6. Make note of whatever you want to remember from the experience.

7. Put into action any advice you receive from your wise, successful and highly-evolved future self.

 

Going Global

 

While you’re having the conversation with your wise, successful and highly-evolved future self, ask if your future self has any comments about how you can best serve the world.

A Bridge to Joy

Some years ago, I read a book called Bridge of Light by LaUna Huffines. It changed my life.

 

At this season of joy, I’d love to share with you my favorite visualization from that book.

 

I don’t have the book in front of me, so I’m going from memory – mostly, the memory of how wonderful I feel every time I do this visualization.

 

1. Take a few moments to get grounded and relaxed. Imagine you can actually feel your connection to the earth. Take a few deep breaths and consciously relax your muscles. Set the intention that only that which is for your highest good is allowed into this visualization. Close your eyes if you are comfortable doing so. Allow yourself to relax into this experience.

 

2. Imagine that you are able to see the place in the universe that is the source of all joy. For a few moments, just contemplate whatever image you have of the source of all joy.

 

3. Imagine that from your heart, you are sending out a beam of light that goes right to the source of all joy and is anchored there. Imagine that from the source of all joy, a beam of light flows back right into your heart.

 

4. Keep imagining that beams of light are travelling from your heart to the source of all joy, and from the source of all joy into your heart. As more and more beams of light travel back and force across the cosmos, they are forming a bridge of light.

 

5. Imagine that you can actually stand on that bridge of light. (Yes, your cosmic heart is big enough to encompass you standing on the bridge of light.) Imagine that you are standing on the bridge of light and seeing and feeling the energy from the source of all joy.

 

6. Imagine that you are walking across the bridge of light, and walking into and being totally immersed in the source of all joy. Imagine that every cell of your being is encompassed in and permeated by the joy energy.

 

7. When you feel ready, move back to the bridge of light. Imagine yourself walking back across the bridge of light and carrying that infusion of joy energy into your heart.

 

8. Savor the experience until it feels “finished.”

 

9. Gently return to your regular reality. Wiggle your toes and fingers, roll your shoulders, stretch, take a few deep breaths to be sure you’re totally back in your body. Whenever you are ready, open your eyes.

 

10.  Whenever you feel ready, move into the rest of your day, knowing that whatever you do and wherever you go, you are immersed in cosmic joy.

 

 

Your Coaching Challenge

 

Take a few minutes every day to immerse yourself in the energy of joy.

 

Going Global

 

Imagine the whole Planet Earth being on the Bridge to Joy.

Are You Magnetic?

Magnetic personalities

 

Have you ever met someone with a magnetic personality? In any room, that person is usually the center of attention. People want to be around that person. Something about the person’s energy or personality is like a magnet to others.

 

Maybe you are someone with a magnetic personality. People are drawn to you. When there is something you desire, the circumstances and support you need seems to appear, and you are carried on a wave of positive energy to whatever you desire – or something even better.

 

In my own life, I’ve noticed that sometimes I feel magnetic and sometimes I do not. Sometimes everything I desire shows up easily and seemingly with little conscious effort on my part. Other times it seems that everything is a struggle. Perhaps you have had similar experiences – that your “magnetism” seems to be an up and down proposition.

 

Actually, it’s not. Let me explain.

 

Magnets at work

 

When you were in school, did you ever see magnets at work? I remember being fascinated when the science teacher sprinkled iron filings on a counter top. Then he placed a magnet on the counter. Magically, the iron filings arranged themselves around the magnet.

 

The magnet did not do anything. It just sat there. The iron filings moved. I was amazed. How could this object, the magnet, cause the iron filings to move?

 

There was something else. The science teacher put a wooden pencil by the magnet. Nothing happened. The pencil was not attracted to the magnet.

 

That’s the idea of magnetizing – to attract (not chase) that which you desire; to draw towards you those things, people, experiences and conditions that you desire, that are in alignment with your highest good.

 

The flip side is that you want to be neutral to, or repellent to, those things, people, experiences and conditions that you do not desire.

 

Like attracts like. Even magnets only attract certain things that are in alignment with their frequency or vibration.

 

Want to know what you are magnetizing? Look around.

 

Everything in your life – every object, every person, every experience – is something you have magnetized. Whatever you see is an accurate reflection of the frequency or vibration you are radiating, and that is what you are magnetizing.

 

You cannot NOT be magnetic. So although sometimes I feel like my magnetism is an “up and down” thing, it’s not. I am always magnetizing. So are you. The trick is to be consciously magnetic to those things, people, conditions and experiences that we would prefer to have in our lives and businesses.

 

I have a confession. On the days when I do not feel magnetic (read, I do not especially like what is showing up in my life), I blush to admit that I have been known to mutter and complain, sometimes for more than a few seconds.

 

But here’s what I have noticed.

Perhaps you have noticed this too.

 

Acknowledge and shift your focus

 

The more quickly I acknowledge that I have created this circumstance in my life, the more quickly I can change it. The more quickly I accept my responsibility, calmly and without self-blame, and the more quickly I acknowledge that I have the power to create and uncreate these circumstances, the more quickly and easily the circumstances begin to change.

 

The more quickly I can shift my energy to appreciation for all the amazing gifts in my life, the more quickly the circumstances improve. Perhaps it’s because I am noticing different things. In any case, it feels better and I am re-connected to my inner power.

 

There is lots more to say about this, and there will be more in future issues. In the meantime, here is a key point.

 

What you focus on expands

 

The more you focus attention on examples of what you desire that are already in your life, the more of what you desire you will attract into your life.

 

The more you focus attention on what you don’t want, the more of what you don’t want you will attract into your life.

 

What you resist strengthens. The more you resist something, the more that circumstance hangs around. What you accept, acknowledge and then release, begins to lose its power.

 

So… what do you want to magnetize in your business or your personal life?

 

 

Coaching challenge

 

Pick one thing you would like to magnetize in your business or personal life.

 

1. Imagine in as much detail as you can what it will be like for you when this is in your life.

 

2. Look for examples of this kind of thing that are already in your life. Appreciate and express gratitude for these gifts. Acknowledge that you magnetized these things into your life, and have the power to magnetize other similar things.

 

3. Be still and quiet for a few moments. Ask the wisest part of yourself, “What single action could I take today to move in the direction of magnetizing (whatever is your focus) into my life?”

 

4. Before you leave your “still and quiet” place, decide at what point in this day you will weave in that action.

*****

 

Is there something you wish you had not magnetized into your life?

 

1. Acknowledge that – for whatever reason (and you do not need to know the reason) – you have also magnetized this into your life. Calmly and without self-blame, state to yourself that you had the power to create this circumstance and you would now prefer to release it.

 

2. Imagine what your life will be like when this circumstance is no longer part of it.

Look for parts of your life where this circumstance does not exist.

Appreciate and express gratitude for those parts of your life. Acknowledge that you had the power to create those parts of your life, and can create those positive circumstances in other parts of your life too.

 

3. Be still and quiet for a few moments. Ask the wisest part of yourself, “What single action can I take today to help release the undesired circumstance from my life and create more of the circumstances I desire?”

 

4. Before you leave your “still and quiet” place, decide at what point in this day you will weave in that action.

 

 

Going global

 

The idea of magnetizing -- that like attracts like, and that what we focus on expands -- has a global application.

 

We need to focus on what we do want in the world, rather than what we don’t want.

 

I do not mean to ignore, minimize or deny the problems and miseries of the world. But I am uneasy about strategies that focus on what we are against – whether at the organization, community, national or global level.

 

Just as in our personal lives, rather than to rail against what we do not like, it is far more productive to acknowledge and then release our attention on those things that we do not prefer, and then re-focus our attention and actions on what we do want.

 

And of course, as Gandhi said…

 

Be the change you want to see in the world.

 

Want more love in the world? Be more loving. Want more generosity and sharing in the world? Be more generous and sharing. Want more kindness in the world? Be more kind. Want more abundance in the world? Share your abundance.

Did you forget your socks?

This story may not seem like it connects to entrepreneurs, but keep reading. It will!

 

The judge

 

The Honorable Judge Oscar Gabaldón presides over the Child Protection Court which handles cases of child abuse and neglect filed by the Texas Department of Family and Protective Services in El Paso County, Texas.

 

At a recent conference my husband attended in Baltimore, Judge Gabaldón gave a presentation about how judges and courts can cooperate with others to help make things better for troubled families.

 

Entrepreneurs and entrepreneurial public sector leaders could certainly learn from the Judge’s comments about collaborating with others for everyone’s mutual benefit. (“Joint venture” is a term often used by entrepreneurs; “collaboration” or “coordination” are terms often used in the public sector.)

 

However, the story that most impressed my husband was the one that follows (as my husband told it to me).

 

The judge’s story

 

Judge Gabaldón told of a case in which a woman’s child was removed from her care. Child protection authorities believed her child could be harmed by staying with her. The woman had many difficulties – addictions, abuse and a litany of other miseries. Throughout the court hearing, she did not once look up.

 

After the ruling that her child was to be removed, Judge Gabaldón tried to talk to the woman about what would help the situation, and how the courts or some other organization might help her so that her child could be with her again.

 

As the judge tried to talk to her, the woman still did not look up.  She kept looking down, encased in a sense of shame and self-loathing. 

 

As the judge said in his presentation, “I can’t help people unless they are willing to engage with me.”

 

He got up from his seat on the Judge’s bench, walked down and around to the table where the woman was sitting, and lifted up his judge’s robe slightly.

 

“Look at this,” he said to the woman. “I forgot to wear socks today.”

 

For the first time, the woman looked up at him. “We all make mistakes,” he said. “We just have to move on from there.”

 

He sat down beside her, and they began to talk…

 

And the connection to entrepreneurs and public sector leaders is…

 

I don’t know any entrepreneurs (or leaders of any kind) who have never felt they made a mistake. I’m not saying there are none – just that I have never met one!

 

I know very few men and even fewer women (though I have met a few) who have never felt blame towards themselves.

 

And yet, some of our most important learning, and some of our greatest successes, arise from situations that may seem like a “mistake” at the time.

 

If we have moments when we think we have erred, when we doubt ourselves or regret the outcome of our actions, let’s learn from the compassionate judge. Let’s just acknowledge what is, feel whatever we feel, let go of blame or regret or doubt, and move on.

 

That’s how we can keep creating the life we choose for ourselves and the people we love, and that’s how we keep making a positive difference in the world around us.

 

Being able to accept ourselves when we make mistakes can also make it easier to be matter of fact when we believe someone else has made a mistake. We can acknowledge that we too make mistakes, sit together as equals, and move on to make things better.

 

Your coaching challenge

 

If at any time in the next week you think you have made a mistake, just…

1.  Notice what you believe is a mistake.

2.  Acknowledge what has happened and your part in it.

3.  Feel whatever you feel and think whatever you think – briefly! (Well, okay, you can wallow if you want to, but you’ll probably feel better sooner if you move to the next step!)

4.  Let go of any negative thoughts or emotions. Just let them go.

5.  Tap into the highest intention you can think of (for example, “highest good of all”) and focus as much love as you can on the situation.

6.  Take whatever action you are inspired to take in order to make things better.

 

Going global

 

Have you noticed some situation or someone in the world that you think has made a mistake? (Oh dear, I’ve just realized that I can think of several! Here’s my opportunity – and perhaps yours – to do something different with my opinions.) Try this process.

 

1.  Notice what you believe is a mistake.

2.  Acknowledge that you too have made mistakes, and that “mistake” is your perception but may not be everyone’s perception.

3.  Feel whatever you feel and think whatever you think, as briefly as you can.

4.  Let those thoughts and feelings go.

5.  Shift your attention to sending as much love and positive intention as you can for the situation and the people in it.

6. If you can think of any action that might help make the situation better, do it. If you cannot think of any action, just continue to send as much love and high intention as you can.

If a “vampire” is someone close…

Here are a few suggestions if you find yourself in a situation in which you are frequently in the presence of a person who is undermining or draining or just plain harmful to those close.

 

1. Protect yourself (your energy field) every way that you can think of.

  For example…

If you were in a physically toxic environment, you might wear protective gear or a gas mask. If you must be in an environment where the emotional and mental environment is toxic, you could imagine that you are wearing “energy” protective gear and a gas mask…

Or… perhaps you could ask the energy of the angels or some other loving cosmic entity to protect you from harm…

Or… imagine that you are surrounded by a pillar of clear light. Only positive things are able to reach you, but anything that could cause you harm is not able to get through the light pillar.

Or… you might have other ideas that are perfect for you…

 

2.   Clear the energy of the physical spaces.

  If there is “psychic vampire” behaviour going on, the physical spaces where that happens may begin to hold that abusive emotional and mental energy. Imagine that “cosmic vacuum cleaners” or “energy scrub brushes” regularly clear out the emotional and mental energy. Then  fill the space with the kind of energy you would prefer – the energy of love, joy, peace, fun, etc…

 

3.   Remember you are only responsible for your thoughts, feelings, actions and words.

  You are not responsible for anyone else’s thoughts, feelings, actions or words – even if other people may say you “cause” someone to act or speak in a certain way. Do not blame yourself for another person’s actions or words. Instead, be attentive to what you can control – your own thoughts, emotions, words and actions.

 

4.   Keep checking for negative bonds of attachment between you and the other person.

  (These would be like “energy bonds.”)

  If you can find a quiet place for a few minutes, do an energetic “scan” from your head to your toes and see if you can sense any places (front, back or sides) where there are negative energy connections between the two of you.

  If so, disconnect any negative bond from yourself, cover the “energy scar” with your hand and ask for your healing. Then in your imagination, connect the open end of the bond (that is still connected to the other person) to the Universal Source or God Energy.

 

5.   Tell someone

  If there are one or two people you can trust absolutely, let them know something of your situation and arrange for places where you can safely “disappear” if necessary for a while. In those times, re-connect with your strength, power and inner wisdom, and regain your equilibrium. Ask for inner guidance and open to the possibilities of having a more positive life.

 

6.   Protect your safety

  If the other person is less able to “reach” you or affect you, the person may begin to feel the difference. That shifts the balance of power. That shift could lead to different sorts of results.

  The other person could lose interest in the game and fade out of your life (that would be okay, right?)

  The other person could “up the ante” and use more extreme tactics to “get” to you or do you more visible harm.

  Occasionally, (very rarely) I have known situations where the other person actually changed and became a person that was safe for others to be close to.

 

  Two things are really important.

  It’s really important that you keep reinforcing your intention that whatever it is that the other person is seeking, the person is able to get from the Universal Source (or God or the Creator or whatever is your perception of The One Who Creates Everything). Imagine that the other person is being flooded with loving Source energy so that the need to diminish or control or have power over others is lessened.

  On a practical level, it is important to take care to be vigilant about your own personal safety. That is another reason it is important to tell one or two people you can trust absolutely about your situation. You could even arrange signals to let them know if they should check how you are doing.

 

7.   Pamper and care for yourself in every way that is possible for you.

  Remind yourself that you are a miracle created by God, and you deserve to be cherished and respected. Treat yourself with love and kindness (at least in your thoughts and emotions) as much as you possibly can, no matter what is going on around you.